11/06/2005

The end of me

I've had a really bad day today..the word bad doesnt even do justice to how crappy this day was...after talking to a few people i've realised that no one in my family trust me...they say one things to me and in my back they go ask about what i do in my spare time..where i go...who i talk to...how i'm like with others...WHAT THE HELL!!...i've decided never to talk to anyone anymore...thats it...i'll just go back to how i used to be and distance myself from them...i've tried so much to open up and when i finally have it backfired in an indirect way...now i'm just gonna shut up and take it like how i have in the past...They never knew and will never know what i'm going thru..my life to them is a closed book now...despite how bad i wanted them to be a part of it now i wont even let them in...to them i'll just be a person thats just there..my feelings they wont see...my thoughts they will never know...let them treat me the way they want to...i know i havent completly opened up to them about my problems other than a few things that were bothering me..but honestly thank god i haven't completly opened up...cuz now i'm gonna lock myself up and not let anyone from my family in anymore..i still love them though...all i have left to say is let's see what happens next..

Written by Heavy Red :: 5:35 AM :: 7 Thoughts:

Your thoughts?

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